Werder crashed to a 7-0 defeat against the Dutch top-flight side in Friday lunchtime's friendly and looked especially ragged in the first half.
By the 41st minute, Bremen were already 6-0 down. Niclas Füllkrug snapped after the fourth goal. "This is all madness here!" the returnee shouted in disbelief as the humiliation unfolded, after veteran goalkeeper Markus Kolke had started it with a dreadful blunder and by giving away a penalty after five minutes.
Kolke failed to control a backpass from Amos Pieper and then brought down Lucas Vennegoor of Hesselink for a clear penalty. Marko Pjaca struck in the 14th and 21st minutes, Kristian Hlynsson scored in the 15th, Daan Rots added another in the 40th and Youri Regeer put through his own net in the 42nd before the half-time whistle finally stopped it. Aske Adelgaard then added the final goal in the 70th minute.
That collapse is all the more worrying because, despite 17 players being unavailable through international call-ups or injuries, Daniel Thioune still named six regular starters in his starting XI.
Werder debacle comes as a surprise after good start to the season
Thioune stayed on the bench with his assistants for several minutes after the half-time whistle. Then, visibly affected, he headed down the tunnel and presumably gave his team a loud dressing-down.
Even so, the friendly humiliation came as something of a surprise. Werder had opened the Bundesliga season well with seven points from four games. Füllkrug had stood out with three goals, as had the in-form Marco Grüll. Other new signings such as Chuki had also already impressed. A week on Friday, Werder travel to BVB, who have won every game so far. There is hardly a tougher task in the Bundesliga right now.