Let's give Buna Halle credit: What the club lack in resources, they make up for in creativity.
Bastian Schweinsteiger has received a unique proposal from the German amateur side, who have offered the World Cup winner a plot of land, a variety of beer and much more to sign with the club.
Buna spokesman Sascha Gerber put forward the proposition in a letter on the club's Facebook page on Monday, offering land in the most popular part of town and tennis club membership for his wife, former French Open champion Ana Ivanovic, as well as a nanny for their first child.
Buna also emphasised the appeal of social life in Saxony-Anhalt, taking time to highlight the selection of local beer and chocolate that would be at Schweinsteiger's proposal.
"We are not in the Champions League just yet," the club wrote. "The road is hard, but with you as our star attraction it is not impossible — you can't defeat a footballing god.
"Several of our players are big fans of yours, and would love to go on the journey with you. And let's not forget the social aspect. After training and matches you can recharge your batteries with our 20 different beers."
While Chicago Fire general manager Nelson Rodriguez told MLSSoccer.com on Friday that they are "very close" to bringing Schweinsteiger back for a second season, it's safe to say the MLS side won't be able to match Buna's final pitch.
"Maybe," the German side wrote, "we could name our stadium after you."