“As soon as I started to play, [my family] knew my big dream was playing for Manchester United.”
You know when you know you’re punching? When your partner’s better than you in every way, and yet they somehow stick by your side despite your declining looks, thinning hair and unwieldy athlete's foot that only persists because you won’t go to the doctors.
Throughout the week, you get drunk or stoned and fall asleep on the sofa in your jeans, but your other half’s boundless dedication means they’ll still wake you up with freshly ground coffee and a kiss, selflessly bailing you out of stupid situations time after time, year after year, purely because they are in love with you. Manchester United don’t deserve Bruno Fernandes, but somehow he is, and probably will forever be, ours.
