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'How am I sitting in a cell like I'm some murderer?' - Jermaine Pennant opens up on devastation of being sent to prison, scoring a hat-trick for Arsenal after vodka-fuelled night of partying & facing 'puppy' Lionel Messi

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    Pennant feared he'd be beat up in prison

    Then on a loan spell with Birmingham City from parent club Arsenal, Pennant spent 30 days in prison back in 2005 after being found guilty of driving offences. Reflecting on the moment the judge told him that he would be going to jail, the 42-year-old told Adebayo Akinfenwa: "The worst thing I could've dreamt of happened. I thought: 'That's it, I'm done, my career's done'. I was in a state of shock. I was like: 'This is not happening - is there a way I can appeal?' I can remember the guards coming in, taking me into the van. Then the journey to the prison, I was like: 'Has this really happened? What am I going to do? Am I going to get beat up?' 

    "I had my single cell, I think I cried the fourth day in. The first two or three days were pure shock. I was still numb. Once that went away, I broke down. What have I done with my life? How have I got here? I was playing for Arsenal, playing in the Premier League, setting up [Emile] Heskey for goals, celebrating with my fans, had the world at my feet at one stage. How am I sitting in a prison cell like I'm some terrorist, murderer, rapist, because that's who I was amongst. I was in a Category A prison, which is for the worst offenders out there.

    "They let me go to the gym, morning and afternoon, you're only supposed to be allowed one session a day. There was a football game we'd play, I'd join in that, which was absolutely outrageous. It was like Mean Machine with Vinnie Jones. I had to jump so high to miss a tackle, I'd have been dead. This guy came diving in like it was UFC. Not only was I thinking I was going to lose my career, it was my freedom. I can never take freedom for granted again. Friends, family, all of those emotions come pouring in. 

    "I was doing loads of writing to my family, my partner at the time, fans as well. I got some news when I was in there, which said I've got another chance. On the phone with my manager: 'Birmingham were over the moon with your loan move, they want to make it permanent'. I agreed, obviously. I didn't even ask about wages. They could've said we'll pay you some KP nuts and a couple of cans of coke a week. I said: 'Done, sign me up!'"

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    Partying the night before his full Premier League debut

    Arsenal splashed out £2 million to sign Pennant as a 15-year-old - a record transfer for a trainee at that time. He had to wait years for his chance to start for the Gunners, however, and explains how, having become frustrated at his situation, he had been out partying the night before a Premier League game against Southampton, expecting to only be named on the bench by then-manager Arsene Wenger. 

    He said: "There was this FHM party at Emporium. So I was like: 'This is going to be fire'. [Ashley] Cole wasn't in the team, so he was going, [Paolo] Vernazza, they were all going. I've got FOMO. I tried to make a case, like I was a lawyer or something. I was like: 'Boys, if I come, and I leave by half 11, and I'm home by midnight, it's fine'. They're going: 'No, if someone sees you out, you're finished'. They were fueling me, they tried to lock me in the apartment. They got the cabs and left. So I got a taxi, met them there, bowled in about five or 10 minutes later and they all saw me and were like: 'You knob'. They ignored me for about 45 minutes to try and prove a point.

    "I've ended up getting a bit Lionel Messi. I think I got home around 4am or 5am, and probably slept at 6am. I had to meet at Four Seasons Hotel, Canary Wharf, where the team meeting was, at half 11. I probably had five hours sleep, to go straight across, and I'm feeling like death. I'm like: 'I've got a game today, I can't do this'. Arsene gives out the team, pulls the sheet back and then on the right it says: 'Pennant'. And I went: 'Oh, no, that's me'. So I'm blaming Arsene [for picking the team on the day of the game]! 

    "I was sh*tting it for the next four hours. I was thinking: 'What am I going to do? Think of a way to get out of this. What if I can't run? What if I fall over?' I could just taste pure Vodka. Arsene was giving instructions and I was looking down and he must've thought I was sh*t scared. I was thinking: 'I've got a plan, pull your hamstring, 25 minutes, pretend your hamstring's gone'. I scored one after 20 minutes, and I was like: 'Thank God'. Then I score a second goal, I was like: '[Get to] half-time, just go over to the physio and say you're feeling something, maybe you can't come out for the second half'. Score a hat-trick, and I'm like: 'I'm playing 90 minutes!'"

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    Being shocked at 'little infant' Messi's otherworldly talents

    Pennant spent a year in Spain playing for Real Zaragoza during the 2009-10 season and looks back at the time he faced Lionel Messi, during a campaign where the Argentine would score 34 La Liga goals on the way to winning the title under Pep Guardiola. He said: "Barcelona and Real Madrid, we got clapped by them each time. I can remember we went 1-0 up [against Barcelona], buzzing, everyone got giddy. Messi comes out: 'None of that on my watch'. He definitely scored two, I think he scored a hat-trick, and we lost 4-2. 

    "Thierry [Henry] was playing for them at the time. After the game I went to go and speak to Thierry, chatting away and standing in the changing room doorway, and he goes: 'Look at him'. I look at Messi, he's sitting down like a little infant, he should be in Kindergarten or something. Thierry goes: 'Look at him. Jermaine (gestures with his hand to express appreciation). That's coming from a legend like Thierry Henry."

    Pennant added on how he felt about Messi starring against Zaragoza: "How's this puppy doing this to my team? I'm coming off feeling violated. We played Barcelona, we got thumped 6-1, manager brought me off maybe shy of an hour and I can remember he tapped me on my back and just said: 'There's nothing you could've done'. I had like five touches, I didn't see the ball."

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