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Fish & Chip Shots: Jilted Youth
United’s win over Arsenal is the main talking point in today’s “Fish & Chip Shots.”
Feb 2, 2010 2:13:00 PM
By Shane Evans
So Arsenal fans, what do you have to say for yourselves now? Who are we going to blame for this latest performance? The referee? Manuel Almunia’s half-Britishism? Or could it be that Nani actually is a magician, schooled at Hogwarts, and used some kind of spell to lull Gael Clichy to sleep for 90 minutes?
Nope, not buying it.
All jokes aside, there isn’t much that Arsenal can take from that match. They didn’t start to play until they were 2-0 behind. By then, one could argue, it was nearly too late. Ji-Sung Park’s wonderful third just put it out of reach.
I’m not sure why it is, but Arsenal have had trouble against the big boys. Losses to Manchester United (x2), Chelsea, Manchester City and unimpressive matches against Liverpool and Everton leave question marks surrounding the leadership and maturity of the team.
I hate to harp on this because I know you all think I’m too hard on your poor innocent Gunners, but how can they expect to win trophies if points aren’t had from these matches? I’ll give them this though, their most sound beating of a established team, after the 6-1 opening day rout of Everton, had to be when they destroyed Spurs 3-0 in the NLD. Not enough.
I’m not a cruel person. I truly want to see Arsenal succeed, believe it or not, they just lacked some serious punch on Sunday. From the start of the match until the scoring was widened to 2-0, like I said, just nothing going on.
My gut is telling me that a team like Manchester United who fielded a team with a combined medal count up in the 50s just understood the importance of a match like that. Yeah, sure, you understand the importance, but do you really understand the importance? You can debate this all you like, but knowing is half the battle.
All is not lost however. Not by a long shot. Our boys in red have every chance to harness the power of Arsene’s snorkel jacket and come out and do some serious damage to Chelsea’s title hopes this weekend. I expect a much better performance from Wenger’s men in this match...but more on that this Friday.
Keeping things fair, as I like to do, we’ll switch gears and talk a little about the team that came out on top at the Emirates, one Manchester United. Classy performance by the Red Devils, highlighted by two men in particular: Nani and Wayne Rooney.
Luís Carlos Almeida da Cunha or simply Nani is still a bit of an anomaly to me. He had a great game and should be proud of his performance. I still don’t buy it though. For all the flashes of brilliance he exhibits, that sneaky little move to cut inside for United’s first being one, he makes three silly plays. He’s only 23 and has a lot of room to grow, but right now he’s more of a loose cannon than a dependable force. He’s stolen Antonio Valencia’s spot in the XI for the moment anyway.
Only a year older is Mr. Wayne Rooney who, if you didn’t think was one of the best strikers in the world before this season started, you surely do now. I’ve been saying it since Puppet Ronnie signed with Real Madrid, Rooney would flourish without that Portuguese winker being around, and he surely has.
As menacing as Carlos Tevez, as powerful as Didier Drogba and as lethal as Fernando Torres, Rooney has it all. Who remembers that JogaTV commercial from a few years back where he was playing goalie? About sums up his influence if you ask me. Oh, and you have to love a grizzly Eric Cantona. So dreamy...
Thankfully, I’ve had enough of this match and it’s time to focus my efforts elsewhere. How about Liverpool? The Reds are on a little six-game unbeaten run and have managed to ward off the Rafa exit talks. I still think they’ll finish fourth, just need some time to get back on track. Apparently things are working out and it comes to a head this weekend when they take on the also surging Everton.
The Toffees' last loss? Versus Liverpool back in November. Not too shabby really...especially when you consider the terrible form they suffered through during the beginning part of the season. The Landy Cakes Effect? Can’t be as the run extended way before he got to Goodison, but they are certainly doing good things when it matters.
Which leads me somewhat indirectly to my last little bit of business before we forge on. Liverpool-Everton or Chelsea-Arsenal? What match will be the lead match on Friday? I’m leaning towards Merseyside, but I’ll take suggestions, wants, needs, etc. Let me know. You know how to get ahold of me by now. If not: email, Twitter, Facebook.
Pickled Onions
The first match, oh what was I thinking? I put faith in Arsenal to overcome Manchester United and take a huge step towards big things and I get it spat back in my face in the form of XI (actually X, Alex Song played a solid game) hapless kids getting kicked around the pitch. Shame, really.
After that, I picked Aston Villa to go into the Cottage and put on a show and take points from Fulham. That happened as predicted. Is it me or is Gabby Agbonlahor making a strong case to be a part of Fabio Capello’s World Cup squad this summer? A quality double against the Cottagers should certainly help. If I’m Emile Heskey, I’m pretty worried right now.
Finally, I went with Wolves in the last game and was almost undone. If Jozy Altidore would have stayed on the field for the whole match, I probably would have been. The lad played a monster game and I guess he realizes the pressure is on, given that Amir Zaki is in town now.
Overall: 32-17
Another split week. How did you all do? Are you playing along with me? All four of you who are reading, I’d like to know.
Mushy Peas
I think it’s obvious where we’ll start here: John Terry.
Add his name to the list of naughty professional athletes who can’t keep their hands to themselves. Literally. I don’t get it. He could have ANY WOMAN HE WANTED. Well, any single woman. He had to go after someone else’s girl. Just doesn’t seem right to me. It isn’t right, that’s why. Hands off, JT!
Acknowledging that what he did was wrong, that he’s a complete wanker for doing it, and the fact that I won’t be wearing his England jersey anytime soon, I think it’s important to realize the nature of the issue: a personal one.
I know it’s hard to cast your gaze in a different direction when someone has celebrity status, but honestly, it’s their business not ours. I don’t agree with it, not one bit, but I think as a human being, Terry has the right to figure out his issues privately, and the same can be said about the FA and everyone involved.
Take the Tiger Woods incident, for example. Prior, he was the clean cut, white knight of golf and had the respect of everyone. When the controversy broke, yes, he was wrong and did wrong by his (absolutely babelicious) wife, but things were only made worse by the constant media spotlight.
Given that I have no say and absolutely zero influence in the matter, I don’t know why I feel the need to say anything, but frankly, it’s not our concern. He’s a football player. He leads on the field, not off of it. We don’t have to like him. His teammates do, that’s all. If you’re Wayne Bridge, I’m sure you’d like to see him off the team, which is fair, but imagining a World Cup scenario with Bridge at left-back and no Terry in the middle is extremely worrying to me.
The Fixins’
Lost Soul of the Week: Robbie Keane, Celtic
What a poor story this is. He’s just got those puppy dog eyes that you can’t be mad at. How could you after his up and down career? Failed moves to Inter, Liverpool, and Spurs (the second one) have left old Keano in football purgatory. Going to a better place at Celtic should help fix things, but the little Irishman may have run out of luck (ha, get it? I crack myself up sometimes). Prolific in his first stint with the Lilywhites, our boy may be losing his touch. I hope he finds the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Ok, I’m done for real this time.
Tweet of the Week: @midnightrevs
“@shanEvans although I didn't see the match - I hear your Foxes held off the Toon despite being down a man. well done. Bad sign for us IMHO”
I love to hear pangs of support for Leicester City. They are few and far between, but I have to say that match against Newcastle on Saturday, which was aired on ESPN360 AND Setanta, I might add, was quite impressive. Down to 10-men for over an hour, the Foxes held together and took the fight to Newcastle. More on Friday. Thanks for the recognition, Mr. Alexandre.
Player of the Week: Wayne Rooney, Manchester United
A complete terror against Arsenal. Was all over the place and made the Gunners pay at the beginning and tail end of a sublime counterattack to widen the score to 2-0. Now has 20 goals on the year and is showing no signs of slowing. Keep it up, Wazza! For the Queen! For England! Huzzah!
Rotten Egg of the Week: Portsmouth
They need an owner by next week or they will be the first English Premier League team to go into administration. I still have trouble grasping what that means, given my ties to American sports, but I know it’s not a good thing. In fact, it’s real bad. If I was a millionaire, which I plan on being sometime in my life (not within the next seven days, unfortunately), I’d definitely buy Pompey and then I’d buy all the Brazilians I could afford.
Gaffe of the Week: Transfer spending
£30 million? That’s NOTHING! What happened lads? We suffering through a rough economic spot or something? I must have missed the BBC updates. Wouldn’t be a gaffe if I didn’t think that some teams obviously needed to improve. Sorry Rafa, Maxi is good, but not enough. I have to hand it to Carlo though...he said he’d run around Chelsea’s training ground in the nudo if his team bought anyone. People doubted, he didn’t buy, Carlo wins. He always does.
Goal of the Week: John Terry, Chelsea
Stand up and be counted! What a timely and appropriate goal by Mr. Terry. Amidst all that he has done, ‘captain fantastic in the sack’ netted the winner for his Blues against a stingy Burnley side. I’m all about karma, but I like irony more. ‘Nuff said.
Game of the Week: Hull City 2-2 Wolverhampton Wanderers
Most goals, most chances, most excited, most orange. Least talent. I’m spent. Need to recharge my batteries for this weekend. Holy moly. Stay classy, planet earth.
Shane Evans is an Associate Editor of Goal.com. His feature, "Fish & Chip Shots" appears weekly. Contact Shane at shane.evans@goal.com with questions, comments and concerns, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/shanEvans or join the TFE/FCS Facebook fan page!
For more news on England, visit Goal.com's England section!
So Arsenal fans, what do you have to say for yourselves now? Who are we going to blame for this latest performance? The referee? Manuel Almunia’s half-Britishism? Or could it be that Nani actually is a magician, schooled at Hogwarts, and used some kind of spell to lull Gael Clichy to sleep for 90 minutes?
Nope, not buying it.
All jokes aside, there isn’t much that Arsenal can take from that match. They didn’t start to play until they were 2-0 behind. By then, one could argue, it was nearly too late. Ji-Sung Park’s wonderful third just put it out of reach.
I’m not sure why it is, but Arsenal have had trouble against the big boys. Losses to Manchester United (x2), Chelsea, Manchester City and unimpressive matches against Liverpool and Everton leave question marks surrounding the leadership and maturity of the team.
I hate to harp on this because I know you all think I’m too hard on your poor innocent Gunners, but how can they expect to win trophies if points aren’t had from these matches? I’ll give them this though, their most sound beating of a established team, after the 6-1 opening day rout of Everton, had to be when they destroyed Spurs 3-0 in the NLD. Not enough.
I’m not a cruel person. I truly want to see Arsenal succeed, believe it or not, they just lacked some serious punch on Sunday. From the start of the match until the scoring was widened to 2-0, like I said, just nothing going on.
My gut is telling me that a team like Manchester United who fielded a team with a combined medal count up in the 50s just understood the importance of a match like that. Yeah, sure, you understand the importance, but do you really understand the importance? You can debate this all you like, but knowing is half the battle.
All is not lost however. Not by a long shot. Our boys in red have every chance to harness the power of Arsene’s snorkel jacket and come out and do some serious damage to Chelsea’s title hopes this weekend. I expect a much better performance from Wenger’s men in this match...but more on that this Friday.
Keeping things fair, as I like to do, we’ll switch gears and talk a little about the team that came out on top at the Emirates, one Manchester United. Classy performance by the Red Devils, highlighted by two men in particular: Nani and Wayne Rooney.
Luís Carlos Almeida da Cunha or simply Nani is still a bit of an anomaly to me. He had a great game and should be proud of his performance. I still don’t buy it though. For all the flashes of brilliance he exhibits, that sneaky little move to cut inside for United’s first being one, he makes three silly plays. He’s only 23 and has a lot of room to grow, but right now he’s more of a loose cannon than a dependable force. He’s stolen Antonio Valencia’s spot in the XI for the moment anyway.
Only a year older is Mr. Wayne Rooney who, if you didn’t think was one of the best strikers in the world before this season started, you surely do now. I’ve been saying it since Puppet Ronnie signed with Real Madrid, Rooney would flourish without that Portuguese winker being around, and he surely has.
As menacing as Carlos Tevez, as powerful as Didier Drogba and as lethal as Fernando Torres, Rooney has it all. Who remembers that JogaTV commercial from a few years back where he was playing goalie? About sums up his influence if you ask me. Oh, and you have to love a grizzly Eric Cantona. So dreamy...
Thankfully, I’ve had enough of this match and it’s time to focus my efforts elsewhere. How about Liverpool? The Reds are on a little six-game unbeaten run and have managed to ward off the Rafa exit talks. I still think they’ll finish fourth, just need some time to get back on track. Apparently things are working out and it comes to a head this weekend when they take on the also surging Everton.
The Toffees' last loss? Versus Liverpool back in November. Not too shabby really...especially when you consider the terrible form they suffered through during the beginning part of the season. The Landy Cakes Effect? Can’t be as the run extended way before he got to Goodison, but they are certainly doing good things when it matters.
Which leads me somewhat indirectly to my last little bit of business before we forge on. Liverpool-Everton or Chelsea-Arsenal? What match will be the lead match on Friday? I’m leaning towards Merseyside, but I’ll take suggestions, wants, needs, etc. Let me know. You know how to get ahold of me by now. If not: email, Twitter, Facebook.
Pickled Onions
The first match, oh what was I thinking? I put faith in Arsenal to overcome Manchester United and take a huge step towards big things and I get it spat back in my face in the form of XI (actually X, Alex Song played a solid game) hapless kids getting kicked around the pitch. Shame, really.
After that, I picked Aston Villa to go into the Cottage and put on a show and take points from Fulham. That happened as predicted. Is it me or is Gabby Agbonlahor making a strong case to be a part of Fabio Capello’s World Cup squad this summer? A quality double against the Cottagers should certainly help. If I’m Emile Heskey, I’m pretty worried right now.
Finally, I went with Wolves in the last game and was almost undone. If Jozy Altidore would have stayed on the field for the whole match, I probably would have been. The lad played a monster game and I guess he realizes the pressure is on, given that Amir Zaki is in town now.
Overall: 32-17
Another split week. How did you all do? Are you playing along with me? All four of you who are reading, I’d like to know.
Mushy Peas
I think it’s obvious where we’ll start here: John Terry.
Add his name to the list of naughty professional athletes who can’t keep their hands to themselves. Literally. I don’t get it. He could have ANY WOMAN HE WANTED. Well, any single woman. He had to go after someone else’s girl. Just doesn’t seem right to me. It isn’t right, that’s why. Hands off, JT!
Acknowledging that what he did was wrong, that he’s a complete wanker for doing it, and the fact that I won’t be wearing his England jersey anytime soon, I think it’s important to realize the nature of the issue: a personal one.
I know it’s hard to cast your gaze in a different direction when someone has celebrity status, but honestly, it’s their business not ours. I don’t agree with it, not one bit, but I think as a human being, Terry has the right to figure out his issues privately, and the same can be said about the FA and everyone involved.
Take the Tiger Woods incident, for example. Prior, he was the clean cut, white knight of golf and had the respect of everyone. When the controversy broke, yes, he was wrong and did wrong by his (absolutely babelicious) wife, but things were only made worse by the constant media spotlight.
Given that I have no say and absolutely zero influence in the matter, I don’t know why I feel the need to say anything, but frankly, it’s not our concern. He’s a football player. He leads on the field, not off of it. We don’t have to like him. His teammates do, that’s all. If you’re Wayne Bridge, I’m sure you’d like to see him off the team, which is fair, but imagining a World Cup scenario with Bridge at left-back and no Terry in the middle is extremely worrying to me.
The Fixins’
Lost Soul of the Week: Robbie Keane, Celtic
What a poor story this is. He’s just got those puppy dog eyes that you can’t be mad at. How could you after his up and down career? Failed moves to Inter, Liverpool, and Spurs (the second one) have left old Keano in football purgatory. Going to a better place at Celtic should help fix things, but the little Irishman may have run out of luck (ha, get it? I crack myself up sometimes). Prolific in his first stint with the Lilywhites, our boy may be losing his touch. I hope he finds the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Ok, I’m done for real this time.
Tweet of the Week: @midnightrevs
“@shanEvans although I didn't see the match - I hear your Foxes held off the Toon despite being down a man. well done. Bad sign for us IMHO”
I love to hear pangs of support for Leicester City. They are few and far between, but I have to say that match against Newcastle on Saturday, which was aired on ESPN360 AND Setanta, I might add, was quite impressive. Down to 10-men for over an hour, the Foxes held together and took the fight to Newcastle. More on Friday. Thanks for the recognition, Mr. Alexandre.
Player of the Week: Wayne Rooney, Manchester United
A complete terror against Arsenal. Was all over the place and made the Gunners pay at the beginning and tail end of a sublime counterattack to widen the score to 2-0. Now has 20 goals on the year and is showing no signs of slowing. Keep it up, Wazza! For the Queen! For England! Huzzah!
Rotten Egg of the Week: Portsmouth
They need an owner by next week or they will be the first English Premier League team to go into administration. I still have trouble grasping what that means, given my ties to American sports, but I know it’s not a good thing. In fact, it’s real bad. If I was a millionaire, which I plan on being sometime in my life (not within the next seven days, unfortunately), I’d definitely buy Pompey and then I’d buy all the Brazilians I could afford.
Gaffe of the Week: Transfer spending
£30 million? That’s NOTHING! What happened lads? We suffering through a rough economic spot or something? I must have missed the BBC updates. Wouldn’t be a gaffe if I didn’t think that some teams obviously needed to improve. Sorry Rafa, Maxi is good, but not enough. I have to hand it to Carlo though...he said he’d run around Chelsea’s training ground in the nudo if his team bought anyone. People doubted, he didn’t buy, Carlo wins. He always does.
Goal of the Week: John Terry, Chelsea
Stand up and be counted! What a timely and appropriate goal by Mr. Terry. Amidst all that he has done, ‘captain fantastic in the sack’ netted the winner for his Blues against a stingy Burnley side. I’m all about karma, but I like irony more. ‘Nuff said.
Game of the Week: Hull City 2-2 Wolverhampton Wanderers
Most goals, most chances, most excited, most orange. Least talent. I’m spent. Need to recharge my batteries for this weekend. Holy moly. Stay classy, planet earth.
Shane Evans is an Associate Editor of Goal.com. His feature, "Fish & Chip Shots" appears weekly. Contact Shane at shane.evans@goal.com with questions, comments and concerns, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/shanEvans or join the TFE/FCS Facebook fan page!
For more news on England, visit Goal.com's England section!
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