On The Pitch
1) Germany regularly win major tournaments, while England are still dreaming about their 1966 World Cup win.
2) Germany are used to winning matches after spot kicks. England on the other hand are a certainty to go out once the game goes to penalties.
3) England believe they have a rivalry with Germany, but the Germans don't think they have a rivalry with the English.
4) In Germany, clubs are financially secure and conduct business without debts. In England, clubs are financially insecure and conduct business with massive debts.
5) In Germany, when the great Franz Beckenbauer speaks, the whole country listens to what he says. In England, when the great Bobby Charlton speaks, the whole country thinks 'how old is he now?'
6) You can drink beer in sight of the playing field in Germany, whereas ordering a beer in an English stadium will only result in a strange look from the bartender.
7) England have often derided Ireland for 'pinching' Englishmen who aren't good enough to play for their own country. Germany didn't hesitate to give Cacau a shot in the Nationalelf when the opportunity came up.
8) In Germany, ‘the end justifies the means’, and shirt-pulling, diving, cynical fouls and fooling the referee are seen as important parts of the game. In England, these things are seen as cheating, and the philosophy that ‘the means justifies the end’ is followed, with fair play more important than winning at all costs.
9) In Germany, defending is an art. In England, defending is anti-football.
10) German teams have pretty good youth academies overall, while the English clubs are just waiting for a foreign team to produce some good talents before poaching them.
Off The Pitch
11) The Germans drink lager, while the English stick with ale.
12) We all love beer - but the Germans can drink it en masse without wanting to kill each other. An Oktober fest style beer festival could never happen in England without descending into bloodshed.
13) When Germans go on holiday they are always the first to put their beach towels down. When English go on holiday they are always the first to put their beer jugs down.
14) In Germany, you won't find a single piece of litter even in a rubbish skip. In England, even environmentalists throw their litter on the floor.
15) In Germany, sauerkraut is a finely shredded cabbage. In England, a Kraut is a derogatory term for a German.
16) Germans like the music of David Hasselhoff and he is an A-list celebrity there - in England he is an 1980's relic with a mullet that occasionally pops up in old Knight Rider episodes on the UK Gold channel.
17) German trains are always on time by the second. If you are 10 seconds late, you miss the train. English trains are always delayed. If you are 10 minutes late, you still have 1 hour to wait until the train arrives.
18) England are the most chest-beating of countries when it comes to expression of nationalism, while Germany are very uncomfortable with expressions of nationalistic pride post-war.
19) In England the moustache is very much seen as an 'ironic' or 'kitch' statement. In Germany the moustache is still a functioning part of society.
20) The English regularly joke "don't mention the war", while actually trying to mention the war as much as possible. The Germans literally don't mention the war.